Soft Scorn

Definition :

Misanthropic / adj. A general hatred or contempt for fellow human beings,
of other people in general. Opposite of philanthropist.

example :
Jimmy Carter : philanthropist
Heather : misanthropist

Example of 'misanthrope' in conversation :
Heather : " This movie just shows how stupid people are. I hate people ."
Jay : " My, aren't we the misanthrope ?"
Heather : " What did you call me, you idiot !? Tell me you stupid son of a bitch !
What kind of stupid f**ked up word is that, dumbass? I hate you ! "

(An excerpt from The Werbinox Chronicles)


OR...

Are we ready? Oh,good! Welcome to the forum that lacks wit, mirth, intelligence and ingenuity Comments are welcome, as I cannot hope to hold attention spans on my own merit Blog away! Dear friends, read, learn, and re-affirm your soul and mind!


Feb 27, 2003
      ( 10:32 PM ) sisoflexx
Funny - assed post on
Mad World :

My lovely bride has a co-worker that called yesterday to complain that her car had been ticketed 8-10 times for being parked in a snow emergency route, and was in danger of being towed.

Point 1 - Her car was mostly blocked in as a result of plowing, or at least was not helped.
Counter Point - If you know it's going to snow, don't be a dumbass and park on a snow emergency route.


He had points 1-4, and all of them end with : If you know it's going to snow...

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Feb 25, 2003
      ( 7:19 PM ) sisoflexx
Time for voodoo dance....
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Feb 24, 2003
      ( 1:39 AM ) sisoflexx
Nope, that wasn't it...
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Feb 23, 2003
      ( 9:14 PM ) sisoflexx
Seems everything is down this morning. My hit counter, my FTP server.
What else am I going to do today ? Housework ? Paint kitchen cabinets ?

Crap !
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      ( 8:58 PM ) sisoflexx
I'm about to delete this whole bastarding fecal tit chomper...

...See if I don't.
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      ( 6:37 PM ) sisoflexx
This is unbelievable !
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      ( 5:55 PM ) sisoflexx
F#@k me running !!!
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      ( 5:36 PM ) sisoflexx
This just keeps getting better and better....

By messing around w/ my template, I've screwed something up.

I'd better go back to the original template, just in case....
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Feb 22, 2003
      ( 10:01 PM ) sisoflexx
A mild-mannered man was tired of being bossed around by his wife; so he went to a psychiatrist.
The psychiatrist said he needed to build his self-esteem, and so gave him a book on assertiveness, which he read on the way home.
He had finished the book by the time he reached his house.
The man stormed into the house and walked up to his wife. Pointing a finger in her face, he said, "From now on, I want you to know that I am the man of this house, and my word is law!
I want you to prepare me a gourmet meal tonight, and when I'm finished eating my meal, I expect a sumptuous dessert afterward!
Then, after dinner, you're going to draw me my bath so I can relax.And, when I'm finished with my bath, guess who's going to dress me and comb my hair?"


"The f*@king funeral director," said his wife.

Courtesy of Mabs, who, by the way, seems to have an uncanny similarity to the " wife " in this funny.
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      ( 9:20 PM ) sisoflexx

Besides myself, these poor guys had the most hits today.

I kept
them way too busy !
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      ( 5:33 PM ) sisoflexx
I asked Jay to pose on the deck for a pic so we could capture the lake at it's highest level in years, and also that after last nights' thunderstorms ( which dumped 4 in., and the basement is not an indoor swimming pool ! ) the lake was very brown and churning with mud. ( Which Jay bemoans that fact, as he has to go into the water treatment plant tonight. I told him it's nights like these that makes the job worth while. That right hook was uncalled for, by the way ! )
Anyway, if the picture wasn't too light, or blurry, or 5 miles from the lake, you might see what I was getting at.

What was my point, anyway ?

Ow ! My cheek !



Arrow gives you an idea where the water is, if you could actually see it !
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      ( 4:59 PM ) sisoflexx
No archives for this blog ! Naw, I wanted to be one of the few and proud to leap into the great void, like a great trapeze artiste. No nets, just risk ! That's me, folks.

No, no ! I didn't lose them !

I just can't post them, that's all...

Besides, no one reads the damn blog, anyway, let alone search back into archives for something that doesn't interest them in the past.
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      ( 4:13 PM ) sisoflexx
I was wrong. I was 6,001. Apparently someone wandered in here by mistake.

Fools !
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      ( 4:11 PM ) sisoflexx
I'm going to be # 6,000. You want to know how I know this ?

Simple- I've checked and observed I've had 50 hits today. And they've all been mine. There'll be 50 more before the day is done, ( well on the way to 7,000 ) because I can't fix my fecking archives.

At least I feel oh-so-popular now.
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      ( 3:37 PM ) sisoflexx
Just a couple more hits- and it's 6,000.

Gee, I'm sooo proud !
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      ( 8:34 AM ) sisoflexx
At eight in the morning I hear a low roar ( but loud enough to hear ) that sounded like someone tooling around on a Harley. I was looking out the windows, thinking, how rude, when I saw a speedboat zipping across the lake.
I can just imagine what our neighbors right on the lake thought!
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Feb 21, 2003
      ( 6:37 PM ) sisoflexx
Sorry about all the changes- it just shows you how bored I am !
I'm coming down with something, I'm not sure what, yet. I have aches and chills, my eyes are starting to burn.
It hurts when I swallow, Jay lied when he told me it wouldn't hurt. ( Hee ! )
Let's see the new look...
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Feb 20, 2003
      ( 5:19 PM ) sisoflexx
As I was nearing home, I was listening to
Sean Hannity via the airwaves. As I pulled into the driveway, I was still in stitches over this Dr. Jim Jennings and Mark Levine interview. I turned off the engine, and kept listening, sitting in my driveway, loathe to end my amusement.
I hate to get into debates, and I know Mr. Levine would shred moi ( no franch here ! ) me a new sphincter.
Dr. Jennings is part of a .. a.. I don't know, I'm lost on that one, some kind of humane rights group, but I loved hearing Mr. Levine tearing into him !

Listen to this !
I promise you, it's worth it !

Tell me you didn't laugh !
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      ( 3:14 PM ) sisoflexx
I'll tell you what I want, what I really, really want !


Good news, everybody !
Well, maybe just for me... Says
here the Spice Girls may be planning a reunion.
British newspapers were rife with speculation that the reunion could be the start of a Spice revival, with some of the band's members said to be keen on a "greatest hits" album and several one-off concerts after seeing their solo careers slump.

Industry experts said a greatest hits album and tour could be a money-spinner but the girls could also find their army of screaming young fans have grown up to be teenagers who might now cringe at their sight of their old favorites."Their fan base was very young. To them it would be excruciatingly uncool being reminded of what they listened to as kids," a record label insider told the Daily Express newspaper.

They had old fans like me, also. I did make Jay take back their last cd ( 2 xmas's ago ) as it sounded like hip-hop, which I can't stand. If they were to release something like their old ' pop ' music, I'd buy it.

Yeah, yeah, laugh all you want, I love the Spice Girls !
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Feb 18, 2003
      ( 8:44 PM ) sisoflexx


Todays Funny

In a small southern town I saw a wonderful nativity scene, but
one feature bothered me. The three wise men were wearing
firemen's helmets. Unable to come up with a reason or
explanation, I left. At a convenience store on the edge of town,
I asked the lady behind the counter about the helmets.

She exploded into a rage, yelling at me, "You darn Yankees never
do read the Bible!"

I assured her that I did, but simply couldn't recall anything
about firemen in the Bible. She jerked her Bible from behind the
counter and ruffled through some pages, and finally jabbed her
finger at a passage.

Sticking it in my face, she said, "See, it says right here, 'The
three wise men came from afar!'"

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Feb 16, 2003
      ( 7:15 PM ) sisoflexx
Damn ! They've run out of duct tape and plastic sheeting at Home Depot !
That's okay, I have a back up plan. I have plastic grocery bags and twine ( string ) handy, just in case of a
biological hit.
When we hear the sirens, I'll just slip a bag over my son's head and tie it down around his neck..
This will have the same effect as living in an airless room, sucking in carbon dioxide for a few days.

Without the few days , of course.


 Gasp !
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      ( 6:29 PM ) sisoflexx
I found this a while ago, it's a
clock, and when you run your mouse over it, it scatters and follows the pointer, only to reassemble again. Go ahead and give it a try, it's worth it !
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      ( 6:26 PM ) sisoflexx
I visited
A letter from the Olde Countrie, through a link from Gut Rumbles, stemming from an argument over British food vs. Southern cooking. I didn't want to get involved there, but found this funny post :

This amused me-- the average American's view of the Muslim world.
I wondered if my US readers would find this offensive, but have been told by one of them that it's basically true.


Go check out the map ( link ), it's great !
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Feb 15, 2003
      ( 2:21 PM ) sisoflexx
This is one day early, but let me be the first to wish

Rob


Happy 39th Birthday !



This is before I forget, of course, as I won't be posting for the rest of the day !
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      ( 2:11 PM ) sisoflexx
Acidman posts :
" If you're grossly overweight, smoke like a freight train, suffer from high cholesterol, diabetes and prostate cancer and then drop dead of a heart attack, who is to blame? your doctor, of course."
Last August, Smith's widow asked a Cuyahoga County jury to decide who to fault for the seizure -- her husband or his doctor. Maggie Smith brought a wrongful-death suit against Price in common pleas court, where her lawyers argued that he missed billboard-sized warning signs of heart disease. They asserted that even if he had made the cardiologist referral -- documents were hazy on the matter -- it should have come years earlier, after Lawrence Smith's first heart test in 1994. Price's attorneys countered that the physician did everything to help a man who did next to nothing to help himself.
Jurors blamed Price. On a 6-2 vote, they awarded Maggie Smith and the couple's two adult children $3.5 million; a judge later added $1.2 million in prejudgment interest.


I love this ! One of Acidman's readers' commented:

Christ, we can't /always/ have been
this fucking stupid; we wouldn't have
got this far.

Me Ug, me hurt hand on Og fire... Og say
fire hurt, no put hand in fire.

Ug no listen. Ug burn hand.
Us must stop fire for the young ones
of village. Think of youngones.
Brad


Well said !


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      ( 10:59 AM ) sisoflexx
Marba sent this to me the last time gas prices shot up. It's very appropriate now, don't you think ?


Arm & Leg
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      ( 10:22 AM ) sisoflexx
Ugh, this coffee's way too strong...

Updates :

We're all fine, this week has been the usual, except Morgan got in trouble at school, which used to be a usual occurance, I was glad for the reprieve. Some kid took some fecking tater tots off his lunch tray, Morgan did likewise to the other kid, then sandwiches were grabbed a torn up, headlocks ensued. Morgan was held to mainly at fault, even though the other kid was the instigator (?), as he was not sitting at his assigned table in the first place. I asked him why he didn't sit at his table and he told me it's because the only seats left when he gets there are next to the girls. ( Ewww! ! )
Jay's fine, every day he has his ritual of chopping wood, it makes him happy. That's what he said, anyway.
He got in trouble at work a few weeks ago for talking back to a supervisor. I guess the supervisor is on his way out , he has discrimination suits filed against him, and all the employees are aware of this. That's why I told Jay that the man is going to be alot more angrier being cornered. Jay was surprised the man would report him over some thing so silly. But, as I pointed out, if the man isn't a good supervisor, isn't he inclined towards making mountains over molehills ? Before Jay was admonished, he was awarded for perfect attendance. Also, last week he recieved a 5.65 % pay increase. Cool !
My week was the usual, they've hired a new model technician. He seems nice, but those are the ones you need to watch out for. He went to lab school with one of the owners, so that makes it more uncomfortable.
My Dad has been put through more tests than a competitor on " Survivor". Since his anurism isn't an ' emergency ', they've had time to take lots of their money on tests that require him to take a one hour train trip into Philly once a week for the past month and a half. If he'd been rushed to the emergency room, they'd have had him gutted and stiched in no time, " Tests ? We don't have time for stinking tests ! "
Before Christmas, when Marba called and told me worriedly that Dad has this annurism, I went into work the next morning and told my bosses about it.
"Annurism ? Oh, those are dangerous !" said one boss.
" He's lucky they caught that in time, those are lethal ! " the other chimed in.
Both had looks of worry and concern on their mugs.
I told them in case of emergency, that I may have to go to Pennsylvania before Xmas break.
"Oh, he'll be fine, they caught it in time. " said one boss.
"Don't worry, he'll be alright. It sounds like he's doing good ." the other quickly cooed.
Un-

fecking

-believable !
Some more unfortunate news, my Mum was made redundant ( laid off ) again. The U.K. is very unstable job-wise, very hard living. She had another job lined up, and it seemed she would get it, as they were looking for a 'mature' woman, but when I asked her if she'd gotten the job she told me no. I asked why not ?
" I'm too old " she replied. They were looking for someone 10 years younger 'mature'. Oh well.
She's gotten a temp job for a month, and after that, if she doesn't find anything, she's moving back to Manchester to see if she'll have better luck. She doesn't seem too concerned, but then, maybe that's for my benefit.
Other than that, things are fine, we're going out to dinner at Provinos ( Yum ! ) tonight, with Judi and Charles, that will be fun.
Take care of yourselves, peace, out !
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Feb 14, 2003
      ( 6:53 PM ) sisoflexx

These T-Shirts are great ! Go visit
The Regular Guys store for more T's.
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      ( 6:30 PM ) sisoflexx
Jumping through a few links tonight, I found a couple of blogs I found interesting. I should do this more often ! Here is a post on
The Edge of England's Sword:
There's an old theory about Star Trek that says the Klingons are the space Russians, the Romulans are the space Japanese, the Cardassians the space Nazis (a role much better filled by Dr Who's Daleks, IMHO), and so on.

Watching tonight's edition of Enterprise, in which the superior, intransigent, arrogant Vulcans are taught that their way isn't always best made me realise who they are: the space French. Both races even produce remarkably attractive females...


Great weblog, go check it out !
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      ( 5:44 PM ) sisoflexx
This is pretty neat.
Apparently the owners of this house had been seeing images and hearing voices for quite a while.
They did some research and found that a lady once lived in the house who lost her husband during the
Civil War.
Legend says that she used to sit at the table and look across the fields in anticipation of her loved one returning home.
He never came. So, they say she still waits.
They caught this photo of what they claim to be her.
This one was wild and spooky once you find the ghost in the picture.
It took me a few seconds to find it, but when I did, it really stands out.
It is sort of like one of those optical illusions.

To save you some time, concentrate around the table.
Best not to focus too much on one spot. Look around the table and toward the window.
For an added touch turn up the volume, it is really faint, but you can hear
the ghost talking or something, sometimes in a low murmur.
Don't give up you'll see it, be patient.

Click to view the
ghost documentation.
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      ( 5:42 PM ) sisoflexx
Do Something Wild?

An old man was sitting on a bench at the mall. A young man walked
up to the bench and sat down. He had spiked hair in all different
colors:green, red, orange, blue and yellow.

The old man just stared.

Over time, the young man noticed the old man was staring at him.
The young man finally said sarcastically, "What's the matter, old
man,
never done anything wild in your life?"

Without batting an eye, the old man replied, "Got drunk once and had sex with a parrot. I was just wondering if you were my son."

Courtesy of Larry
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Feb 12, 2003
      ( 8:02 PM ) sisoflexx
Ever catch
Dave Attell's Insomniac on Comedy Central ?
Hilarious ! Jay and I watch all the time.
Here's a snip from an interview :
What's the biggest difference between day people and night people?
The smell.

Have you ever been mugged?
Have I been mugged? Well, Igor, I did pay ten bucks to see "Not Another Teen Movie." Sorry -- that was more like a rape.

What's the best sleep-aid?
Whiskey.

What's the dumbest thing you ever did when you were drunk?
I once tried to sit on my own face. Does that count?

Are you an optimist or a pessimist?
What is this, The Real World?

Any advice for the kids?
Advice. Come on I'm a 37-year-old bald, fat man who drinks and smokes too much. What do I know? You're on your own.


Here's a funny pic !
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      ( 7:56 PM ) sisoflexx
Todays Funny
This is for you,
Rob....

A dad walks into a market followed by his ten-year-old son. The kid is
spinning a 25 cent piece in the air and catching it between his teeth.

As they walk through the market someone bumps into the boy at just the
wrong moment and the coin goes straight into his mouth and lodges in his
throat.

He immediately starts choking, going blue in the face, and Dad starts
panicking, shouting for help.

A well dressed middle-aged, moderately attractive but serious woman
in a blue business suit is sitting at a coffee bar in the market reading
her newspaper and sipping a cup of coffee. At the sound of the commotion,
she looks up, puts her coffee cup down on the saucer, neatly folds her
newspaper and places it on the counter. Then she gets up from her seat and
makes her unhurried way across the market.

Reaching the boy, the woman carefully takes hold of the boy's
testicles and squeezes gently at first and then ever more firmly.

After a few seconds the boy convulses violently and coughs up the 25
cent piece, which the woman deftly catches in her free hand. Releasing the
boy, the woman hands the coin to the father and walks back to her seat in
the coffee bar without saying a word.

As soon as he is sure that his son has suffered no lasting ill-effects,
the father rushes over to the woman and starts effusively thanking her
saying, "I've never seen anybody do anything like that before - it was
fantastic. Are you a doctor?"

"Good heavens, no," the woman replies. "I am a Divorce Attorney."

Courtesy of Ameena
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      ( 7:54 PM ) sisoflexx
I had a little bit of fun browsing through chat rooms, seeing as the world wide web was nothing of the sort last night. No pages were coming up. Huh.
Anyway, here's some snippets of a conversation I decided to put my 2 cents in ( Yes, two ) :

Neon willie: bad dreams i heard about a male birth control pill in the UK
Neon willie: is that true
Hate Bad Dreams: It's in test mode
sisoflexx: Yes Neon- called Margeret Thatcher

And :
sisoflexx: yes- a case of Guiness is good form of b.C. pill
VaughanCDS: Clown nothings wrong with BRITS
CASTELSTATUS: NO EATEN IT DONT
Rich0476: Uk here Christie
Christiedallas: LOVE GUINNESS
EATEN BY A CLOWN: ALL NICE BABES IN USA
Neon willie: stop it flexx
Neon willie: lol


I'm so immature.
( This is mild compared to what I do in the religion chat rooms ! )
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Feb 9, 2003
      ( 7:26 PM ) sisoflexx
I took a couple of online personality tests, I am always amazed at what the results yield.

Enneagram
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      ( 7:23 PM ) sisoflexx
Too much time on my hands...
Gay Bear
Gay Bear - This hardly seems surprising...


Which Dysfunctional Care Bear Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

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      ( 11:12 AM ) sisoflexx
Check out the nudie pictures, or calender girls I should say, on the hemp site
420TIMES.COM . What gets me- do hemp growers have such a hard time selling their product that they feel the need to promote with pictures of a girl with a bong up her bung hole?

They really are funny pics ! Makes me wank want to take a hit.
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      ( 11:02 AM ) sisoflexx
Ahh, my favorite !
Kitchen inspections
Sunday, February 9, 2003
The following are among the food service establishments inspected Jan. 27-29 by the Hall County Health Department. The department scores on a 100-percentile scale, with 85 and above considered passing. Kitchens are inspected at least every six months and are required to post their score sheets in public. A new establishment that has never served food must score a 100 to receive an initial report. When a restaurant changes ownership, another inspection is required. The establishment must score a 94 or higher to receive a new permit.

Best ones :
Waffle House, Candler Road, Gainesville Score: 87 Rag bucket has no sanitizer in it. Milk products still found out of date. Repeat violation. Soda spouts have a growth of fungus, ice machine has heavy growth of pink slime mold. Whaaa!?

Rosewood Deli and Catering, 5516 Main St., Flowery Branch Score: 97 Three packages of Swiss cheese dated Nov. 10, 2002, in reach-in cooler. Nice ! Check dates and rotate products as needed. Use or discard products by date on package. Product voluntarily discarded. Voluntarily ?




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      ( 10:46 AM ) sisoflexx
Braylen from
Mad World has done a wonderful piece ( that's story to you ) on Lex :
Ambassador to The Lexfiles - "These are all lies. If you saw me smile, it is because some of the words that Secretary Powell said had three syllables or more. He could have saved himself much effort by simply reading the site. Clearly he harbors unrestrained hatred toward women, and the Lex Files, which honors women above all others. All he need do was ask us, and we will tell him again - we have no inappropriate information - which proves our innocence! In fact, his Excellency the Strikingly Attractive Lex Gibson, just gave an interview with Playboy yesterday which stated there were no inappropriate comments on his site, which proves all we have stated. Mr. Powell is simply bitter and sad that his life has seen no joy, or sense of accomplishment. We look forward to chairing next month's council on de-objectifying women and their amazing tatas. Thank you."

The world will await the outcome.
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Feb 8, 2003
      ( 10:59 PM ) sisoflexx
Things not to say to a police officer who pulls you over:

12. Hey, wasn't your daughter a porn queen?

11. I'm surprised you stopped me, Dunkin Donuts has a 3 for 1
special!

10. If I bend over, will I still get a ticket?

9. No, offi, offic, lucifer . . . I'm not as think you are drunk
I am. I swear to dog.

8. No, I don't know how fast I was going. The little needle
stops at 110 mph.

7. Back off, Barney, I've got a piece.

6. Want to race to the station, Sparky?

5. I know I was weaving, but I was trying to hit all the little
green men!

4. On the way to the station let's get a six pack.

3. You'll never get those cuffs on me. . . You Homo!

2. Come on write the damn ticket, the bars close in 20
minutes!

1. No, YOU assume the position.


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      ( 10:48 PM ) sisoflexx
Hey- hope you all have had a good week !
Same here as usual, work, home, eat, sleep, etc...
I attained a subject from
Rob to write about, children who hurt themselves or get hurt by animals...
I should just write about everyone I know who have given me great stories, or the ones I have witnessed first hand, while I'm at it ! Then again, some acquaintances (?) might not appreciate my candor in their jinxed lives !

For years, being in the foothills of the Appalachian Mountains, we would climb up and stand on decks serving as scenic overlooks, and I would grab Morgans' hand in a vice-like grip when he went too close to a banister. I kept having visions of the fence giving way and Morgan plummetting to his death 100 feet ( or more ) below. It got to the point where I let Jay and Morgan go ahead and look at the view for miles around while I stood by some pines a few yards back. That's how physically ill I got when I saw my son in accidents I viewed myself.
So, when I went with a girlfriend and her son to visit a co-worker who owned some horses, we let both the boys climb over the gate to go see the horses close up. I am a major worry-wart, and even though I felt it was dangerous for my child to be around these huge animals, I held back the over-protective-mom-mode.
I warned Morgan about getting ' behind ' a horse, as they will kick a person. The boys walked around a horse that was slacking out in the sun, but as they passed him, it got up and trotted ahead of them, joining his brethen. Now the boys were behind him. The boys walked closer to the herd, but I was still keeping my eye on this horse. Just as the boys got near the other horses, the horse they were now ' behind ' flicked his tail and caught Morgan in his face. This caused Morgan to grab his face and fall backwards, which I believe saved his life, because the horse also kicked out with one of his hind legs within a second later, which frightened me, but I felt Morgan had just been slapped in the face by the tail. I was ready to jump the gate, but the boys came running up to us, yelling. As they climbed over the gate, I checked Morgans face, but it was covered in mud and horse shit. All I thought had happened was he'd been whipped with the tail. We said goodbye to the horse owner and got to my house, which was a minute down the road. I washed Morgans' face free of dung and saw not only a long scratch on his cheek from the horses' tail, but a nickel-sized silver patch above his eyebrow, basically skinned from the hoof. I took pictures at a side angle which showed a small bump/lump on his forehead. As he was falling back from the tail whip, the hoof glanced his forehead.
This is one of those moments when you look back ( which I didn't have to, I realised it right at that moment I washed his crap-smeared face ) and think, " My boy could've had his face bashed in, he could be dead right now...
Luckily, that wasn't the case, but there you are. One of those magnificent moments where you realise you just may be able to keep your kid alive another few years, and hope they outlast yourself.
I've tried to look for the photo of Morgan in his incident, but couldn't find it, so I'll have to make do without the visuals, and the description will have to do !
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      ( 12:42 PM ) sisoflexx
Mammogram Exercises

Many women are afraid of their first mammogram, and even if they have
had them before, there is fear. But there is no need to worry.
By taking a few minutes each day for a week preceding the exam and doing
the following practice exercises, you will be totally prepared for the test,
and best of all you can do these simple practice exercises right in
your home.


EXERCISE 1:
Open your refrigerator door, and insert one breast between the door and
the main box. Have one of your strongest friends slam the door shut as
hard as possible and lean on the door for good measure. Hold that
position for five seconds. Repeat in case the first time wasn't
effective.

EXERCISE 2:
Visit your garage at 3 a.m. when the temperature of the cement floor is
just perfect. Take off all your clothes and lie comfortably on the
floor sideways with one breast wedged under the rear tire of the car. Ask a
friend to slowly back the car up until your breast is sufficiently
flattened and chilled. Switch sides, and repeat for the
other breast.


EXERCISE 3:


Freeze two metal bookends overnight. Strip to the waist and
invite a total stranger into the room. Have the stranger press the bookends
together as hard as he/she can. Set an appointment with the stranger to
meet next year to do it again.


You are now properly prepared! and just another thought for all you
women out there:
MENtal illness, MENstrual cramps, MENtal
breakdown, MENopause.
Ever notice how all of women's problems start with "MEN"?
And when we have real problems, it's HISterectomy!

Too funny ! Courtesy of Mabs. ( Again ! )
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