Ms. Ann Thrope

( 12:18 AM ) sisoflexx

Yeah, yeah, I know, it's been a while .
It'll probably be a while, too. If I wasn't bored at 1:00 in the morning, you probably wouldn't be reading this, either .
Or seeing this :

There's kid squished in the middle, there, in case you didn't notice !

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( 5:35 PM ) sisoflexx

Eric The Red has posted about his IRapageS , and we're in the same boat. We changed our exemptions, and figured on owning our house . ( This is our first full tax year in our own home )
Charles has been going over it, and no doubt he is scratching his head like he does every year he helps us out. Ah, well, maybe next year...?

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( 5:31 PM ) sisoflexx

Morg and I spent most of our hours this weekend decorating our Ukranian Easter eggs ( Pysanka ). Morg had just finished his second one, which needed to have wax melted off it, disrobing it in its' final glory. Judi volunteered to do this for him, and he asked that she not show it to him until it was done.

My own egg was already bored and the whites and yolk blown out, in other words, hollow. Morg prefers the unmolested eggs. I can drop a hollow egg on the table from 4-5 inches, and it bounces, but the weight of a full egg just plain makes it heavier.
Judi had just removed the last vestiges of the soot and wax when I heard a muffled 'thunk' and looked up from my own egg. I'd hoped it wasn't what I thought it was.

It was. She was nearly in tears, she felt so awful. She called Morg over to tell him, and he thought she was kidding with him. He actually took it quite well, and he made her pay for it for hours afterwards.
I took some pictures, so at least we have those. What a trip !

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( 6:12 PM ) sisoflexx

Todays Funny
A couple was invited to a masked costume Halloween party...

The wife got a terrible headache and told her husband to go to the party alone. He, being a devoted husband, protested, but she argued and said she was going to take some aspirin and go to bed, and there was no need for his good time to be spoiled by not going. So he took his Batman costume and away he went.

The wife, after sleeping soundly for about an hour, awakened without pain, and, as it was still early, decided to go to the party. In as much as her husband did not know what her costume was, she thought she would have some fun by watching her husband to see how he acted when she was not with him. She put on a Goldilocks costume.

So she joined the party and soon spotted her husband cavorting around on the dance floor, dancing with every nice chick he could and copping a little feel here and a little kiss there.

His wife went up to him and being a rather seductive babe herself, he left his new partner high and dry and devoted his time to her.

She let him go as far as he wished, naturally, since he was her husband. After some more to drink he finally whispered a little proposition in her ear and she agreed, so off they went to one of the cars and had a quickie in the back seat.

Just before unmasking at midnight, she slipped away and went home and put her costume away and got into bed, wondering what kind of explanation he would make up for his outrageous behaviour.

She was sitting up reading when he came in, so she asked what kind of time he had.

"Oh, the same old thing. You know I never have a good time when you're not there."

Then she asked, "Did you dance much?"

He replied, "I'll tell you, I never even danced one dance.
When I got there, I met Pete, Bill Brown and some other guys, so we went into the spare room and played poker all evening."

"You must have looked really silly wearing that Batman costume playing poker all night!" she said with unashamed sarcasm.

To which the husband replied, "Actually, I gave my costume to your Dad. Apparently he had a whale of a time. He told me he got lucky with a hottie in a Goldilocks outfit"
Courtesy of Ameena

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( 12:22 PM ) sisoflexx

How quickly we forget... I checked my hits this morning and found one from my blogspot site. I clicked on it and perused the entries I'd written over a year ago.
I laughed my ass off at this story . I didn't realize ( in my own mind, of course ) what a vocabulary I possessed.

Ah, well.

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( 5:57 PM ) sisoflexx

At last !
A crusade close to my heart.
I wrote to Jello about three years ago asking what had happened to Pudding Pops, and those bastards never got back to me. I won't hold my breath now I've signed the petition, either.

Probably more porn, if anything, will end up on my blog and in my email !

Go on, sign up for Pudding Pops to be brought back - or porn, makes no difference.

Thanks to Key for the link !

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( 12:27 PM ) sisoflexx

I got an email from Mabs today :

Fw: 320 LB. WOMAN

I'm not overweight...I'm undertall! :-) The question is, What does a 320 pound woman look like? Now, before you look at her pictures, get a mental image of what you think a woman who weighs 320 looks like.... Got it? Ready?

Of course, there's loads of space between in each sentence, so you have to scroll down for a bunch of pics at the bottom :

Then:
Not what you were expecting, was it??!! The tallest and biggest woman in the world lives in Holland. She is 7'4" and weighs 320.

So after some snooping at snopes, I found a link to the big gals' site, I found some more pictures, and also that she's 6'5" and weighs 210 lbs.

( More like 270 lbs, I would think, but hey, my drivers license claims I weigh 160, so who am I to judge ? )

Either way, she looks good for her size, Jay'll get hot , that I know !

Sorry !
This post has been updated to October 2006 the pics are up and running there.

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( 3:00 PM ) sisoflexx

Todays Funny

A MAN IS LIKE A DECK OF CARDS - A HEART.....TO LOVE HIM A DIAMOND.....TO MARRY HIM A CLUB......TO SMASH HIS FUCKING HEAD IN AND...... A SPADE....TO BURY THE BASTARD....

Courtesy of Mabs. Should I worry for Dad ?

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( 3:45 PM ) sisoflexx

Much has been said about "tough love" for misbehaving children.

Most of America's population thinks it very improper to spank children, so Jay and I have tried other methods to control Morg when he has one of "those moments".

One that we found very effective is for me to just take him for a car ride and talk to him.

He usually calms down and stops misbehaving after our little car ride together.

I've included the photo below of one of our sessions, in case you would like to use the technique.

Thanks to Ameena for this one !

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( 3:32 PM ) sisoflexx

Thanks to Charles for the pic !

Here it is, my first attempt at a Pysanka, or, Ukranian easter egg.

What do you think ?

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( 3:42 PM ) sisoflexx

It doesn't look like a yawn, does it ?

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( 3:12 PM ) sisoflexx

Todays Funnies

An Irishman moves into a tiny hamlet in County Kerry, walks into the pub and promptly orders three beers. The bartender raises his eyebrows, but serves the man three beers, which he drinks quietly at a table, alone.
An hour later, the man has finished the three beers and orders three more.
This happens yet again. The next evening the man again orders and drinks three beers at a time, several times. Soon the entire town is whispering about the Man Who Orders Three Beers.

Finally, a week later, the bartender broaches the subject on behalf of the town. "I don't mean to pry, but folks around here are wondering why you always order three beers?"

"Tis odd, isn't it?" the man replies, "You see, I have two brothers, and one went to America, and the other to Australia. We promised each other that we would always order an extra two beers whenever we drank as a way of keeping up the family bond."

The bartender and the whole town was pleased with this answer, and soon the Man Who Orders Three Beers became a local celebrity and source of pride to the hamlet, even to the extent that out-of-towners would come to watch him drink.

Then, one day, the man comes in and orders only two beers. The bartender pours them with a heavy heart. This continues for the rest of the evening: he orders only two beers.

The word flies around town. Prayers are offered for the soul of one of the brothers.

The next day, the bartender says to the man, "Folks around here, me first of all, want to offer condolences to you for the death of your brother. You know, the two beers and all..."

The man ponders this for a moment, then replies, "You'll be happy to hear that my two brothers are alive and well. It's just that I, meself, have decided to give up drinking for Lent."

The English Language

We polish the Polish furniture.

He could lead if he would get the lead out.

A farm can produce produce.

The dump was so full it had to refuse refuse.

The soldier decided to desert in the desert.

The present is a good time to present the present.

At the Army base, a bass was painted on the
head of a bass drum.

The dove dove into the bushes.

I did not object to the object.

The insurance for the invalid was invalid.

The bandage was wound around the wound.

There was a row among the oarsmen about how
to row.

They were too close to the door to close it.

The buck does funny things when the does are present.

They sent a sewer down to stitch the tear in the sewer line.

To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.

The wind was too strong to wind the sail.

After a number of Novocain injections, my jaw got number.

I shed a tear when I saw the tear in my clothes.

I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.

How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?

I spent last evening evening out a pile of dirt.

Courtesy of Mabs

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( 8:50 PM ) sisoflexx

I had a great time yesterday. I had made plans earlier in the month with my mom-in-law, Judi, to go to an egg decorating 'hen' party. So when she called me up this week to remind me , I was in the mind to back out on her, as I've done numerous occasions. ( It's not just her, I do it with everyone. )
But I recalled that I was interested when she mentioned it, so I got my ass out of bed early and Morg and I headed on down to her house. We went to a gal named Erica's house, and she taught six of us the art of pysanky, or, Ukrainian Easter Egg decorating.
As an art form, I have to admit, it's beautiful. Very interesting, as well.
You add wax with a heated instrument to an egg, covering the color you want to retain in layers, as you dip it in deeper and darker colors as you go.
I know, it sounds wierd.
But we were so involved with what we were doing , the time just flew on by. Everyone's egg looked great, considering we were all newbies, and I'm really happy with how mine turned out. Judi ordered all the equipment online so we can do some more next weekend. So I'm sure you'll see too many pics of eggs you'll get sick of 'em !
When I told Jay over the phone that we were at Erica's house for 5 hours, he said " That must be a damn detailed egg ! "
And I replied, " It IS a damned detailed egg ! "
Here's an example of a pysanka

No, it's not mine, my try-out pales in comparison !

I'll try to have mine posted soon , I'm sure you're all dying to see it ! (Blech !)

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( 12:44 PM ) sisoflexx

Courtesy of Ameena

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( 12:41 PM ) sisoflexx

Todays Funny

Norm & Cliff on "Darwin and Beer"

One afternoon at Cheers, Cliff Clavin was explaining the Buffalo Theory to his buddy Norm...

"Well ya see Norm, it's like this... A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first. This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members.

"In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the lowest brain cells. Excessive intake of alcohol, as we all know, kills brain cells, but naturally it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way, regular consumption of beer elimates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine. That's why you always feel smarter after a few beers."

Courtesy of Mabs

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( 3:57 PM ) sisoflexx

I'm trying to RE-upload some pics, but not all of them. The archived ones I have saved to cd, but I'm not in the mood to take 3 months out of my life reposting them.
Any requests by email, I may post 'em, but I could hold my breath for those requests and still be here next Tuesday, so it's not a big loss.

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( 1:59 PM ) sisoflexx

Mums visit, continued....
Remember, we suprised Mum by letting her know we'd be escorting her to Virginia, and we got up early on Friday to a bacon and omelet breakfast a la Jay. We loaded up the car and made it in good time to Va.

When Mum, Morg and I arrived at my brothers' house, we had it all to ourselves.
Mum started making dinner, and I thought to surprise Diana at her house, so we all loaded into the car once more. She wasn't home, but her mother " Doe " informed us she was at her house, so we drove over there to surprise her there. We went to Dianas house later as she was getting to out with an old school chum of ours, Val. When Val arrived, we caught up on old times, and they persuaded me to go to Old Town Alexandria with them, pub hopping . Remember, I've just driven 9 hours, so I look even worse than usual. These two are all dolled up, I ask Mum to watch Morgan, and would she be okay driving the car back to Lexs' house ? ( I didn't want her driving on the left side of the road ! ) So we left Di's british hubby and my Mum talking about England, and had a great night out.
Val, me,and Di

I look like some aged dude trying to pick them up !

The next morning Mum had us laughing with the night before, trying to put my stick shift in reverse. I had mistakingly assumed sh'ed driven my car before, and she didn't know there's a pull -up notch on the shift, and Diana's hubby couldn't figure it out either. I guess they finally did, because my car was in the driveway !
Lex finally showed up with Jennifer and daughter ( funny how that sounds ) Evelyn. It was great meeting Jennifer, she's a terrific gal. Their baby is just lovely - one of those quiet types that you don't find around often. They stayed the day, and later on Braylen and his lovely bride and daughter popped in for a quick visit to meet Evelyn.

The next morning we all went out to brunch at Murphys Irish Pub in Old Town Alexandria, which we have been doing for years, a family tradition of yore. It was a sad but good idea to do away with the unlimited free champagne, looking back at our crazy drunken days, but the extra charge doesn't stop us anyway.
To top it off, Lex picked up the check ! I almost choked on my steak and eggs !

We spent the rest of the day hanging out once more at his house, Morg and Lex playing LeXBox, Mum and I reading. ( you know, real quality time. ) We had an invite to Doreenes place for a bang up dinner, so off Mum and I went, and had pizza and salad. We got to see Di and hubby, and Princess Holly With Sprinkles On Top, her daughter.
Then we had to beg our leave, and we got back to the house Morg and Lex were right where we left them, controllers in hand, fighting evil.

I got up early, we got to see Lex off for work, and Mum made us Chuckie Eggs and Soldiers ( soft boiled eggs and toast sticks, 'soldiers' ), we got the car packed up and gave Mum kisses telling her not to leave the next visit so long, and off we went on our 9 hour trip back to Jawja. The drive, for a long one, was great. Nice weather, no jams, etc. We made good time. But it took a week to get over it, that's for sure !
Mum stayed with Lex for a few more days, and when she was safely back in England I called her and we had a nice long chat. She had a great time, and got to do alot of things during her stay in Va.

I told her the shop was hers when she wanted it. ( Right, Jay ? )

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